Tag Archives: change

Being Christlike…what does that look like?

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Here is another blog post I pulled out of the archive. I wrote this back in 2015. I pray this encourages, teaches and blesses you!

On 2 separate occasions just this week, God has allowed the opportunity for me to see how a soft answer turns away wrath.  Very simple, yet everyday situations caught me this week and I had to make myself stay calm and be kind.  And I purposely did this because I am trying to discipline myself to be in a Christ like mode at all times.  It’s not easy to always be kind and giving and loving to people, especially when we live in a world full of people who are hard to love.  This is not always easy to do but because I always want people to see the God in me, I have to remind myself when anger or frustration begins to rile up…that I must resist it.  Resist allowing the enemy to use me in a way that will be hurtful to someone else.  Don’t get me wrong, there is some life situations that will get me upset, but it’s how I react to them that God is paying attention to.  Be angry and sin not.  (Ephesians 4:26) If my anger causes me to cuss someone out, or hurt someone’s feelings, or discourage someone, or hit and be violent to them….that is wrong.

In one of the situations, I was bringing my son to his 1st day of summer camp.  On this particular morning they were very unorganized and couldn’t find any of his paper work or registration papers and the woman I was dealing with really wasn’t being very nice to me.  She kept saying that she couldn’t find his folder as if I never signed him up for camp.  But I felt in my spirit to be calm and be kind to her.

While waiting, God was showing me that my son was paying attention to everything that was going on.  If I had gotten angry and acted out, my son would have started his first day of summer camp with the same angry energy, probably feeling confused and not knowing what to do with or about these feelings that I had given him.  We have to be mindful about how we behave in front of our children.  We are their first teachers, their first role models.  Thank you Lord for showing me that!

Despite the way she was treating me, I answered her very nicely and waited patiently. Now look at God….while this woman is telling me she doesn’t know my sons name, 3 different young ladies who work for the summer camp came out at different times and they all knew my sons name and stated they saw his folder when they were setting up.   One of the young ladies goes inside to look for the folder and comes back with it saying she found it and everything is accounted for and he is all set!

I was thinking…”Wow God, look how you did that, this woman was sure my son wasn’t signed up but you sent 3 different people who knew his name!”  What the enemy meant for evil, God made it for good! (Genesis 50:20)

We walked into the building, I pulled my son aside and prayed with him for covering through his day and I watched him go into his room.  God gave me peace throughout my day, and I know it was because I chose to follow His will by reacting in a Christ like manner.  I chose to show them the God in me instead of get upset and yelling and cussing folks.  I refuse to allow the devil to use me in any way.  I don’t entertain his antics.

The other situation was during my lunch break.  I ordered a dish, but first asked if there was meat in it, I don’t eat pork.  She said there wasn’t but when I got back to my desk, opened up the box…there was bacon in it! My first thought was to be aggravated and bring it back to them!!!  But on my way over, my spirit reminded me that a soft answer turns away wrath.  I brought it back to the store and approached the cashier to explain what happened.  That didn’t go well because she didn’t speak English LOL so I went looking for a manager.  This guy said he was the manger but when I asked him again, he really wasn’t the manager LOL (these are all lil situations that should get me even more worked up to be angry, right?!) I asked if he could help me, and explained my situation in a calm and kind way.  I walked out of that restaurant not with my small order I originally wanted but a LARGE order of something else!

I’m sharing this to help you to choose to imitate Christ.  Reacting to situations with anger or frustration is to react in your emotions.  When we react in our emotions, the end result is never good.  I pray this will also help you to see the many ways throughout our day that we can choose God.

For some of us, this may be a bit difficult at first because we are used to reacting in a rough manner.  You don’t have to choose that way.  You can choose a gentle answer, a soft answer.  You wouldn’t believe how easily that will calm down a situation and how pleased God will be of your effort.  God will jump to attention and move on your behalf when he sees that you are choosing His way. If you forget the first few times, its ok…tell God your sorry for reacting that way, pray and try again.

The only way we can know if we are staying in the will of God and living a life that pleases Him is by knowing what He expects of us, knowing the promises He has set aside for us, knowing his Word.  Read your bible.

Proverbs 51:1 ~ a soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.

One step at a time, one day at a time.  Every day is a new day to make positive change in your life.

I’ve posted a survey I found online asking you questions about Christlike attributes. Sit for a moment and take the survey/quiz. Sit where you are in this area. It’s exercises like this that help you to gauge and see where yo are in your Christian walk. We need to assess and stay accountability like this often.

Thank you to ideadoor.com for the image and courtneyaitken.blogpost.com for the surveys

When God calls you out of your dead place, RISE!!

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We have Hour of Power prayer on Sunday mornings at my church. This week I was asked to bring the Word of Edification. The Prayer Team was using John 11:1-44 as their bible reference for this month. This is the story about Lazarus and how he was dead and in the tomb when Jesus came to see about him. I’m being led to share this word of encouragement on my blog.

What I saw when I read the scripture was Lazarus coming out of the tomb, yet this was representing us coming out of our dead places. And the Lord said to me…”When I call you out of your dead place….RISE!

As God was dealing with me about the dead places, He said 1st you have to believe in me and believe that I can do ALL things, that I can do THIS thing. Then He said you must identify the dead place(s) in your life. Let me explain that…there are places in your life that you no longer tend to, you don’t give attention to it, there is no life there, no fruit is bearing there, you’ve avoided it, or dismissed it, you’ve grown tired of it so you left it alone, you lost hope in it, doesn’t grow anymore, you haven’t talked to them in a long time, you don’t see them anymore,  you stopped doing it, maybe some of you stopped coming to church, don’t attend bible study anymore, you’ve gotten away from a healthy activity you used to do, gone back to bad habits. That’s the dead place, the dead thing.

Then the Lord said you have to ask Him for the help. For some of us it is very difficult to ask for help, but there are times that you do need it. We need others. Sorry if you don’t believe that but it’s true. We were not created to do life by ourselves! So, my question to you is….do you want the help? If you do…you have to ask for it!

In vs 41, Jesus says Father, I thank you that you have heard me. That tells me that Jesus asks for something.  Ask God for what you need, nothing is too small and nothing is too big.

Then,  you come out! You RISE up out of that that dead place, that dead situation. Leaving everything that was attached to that dead thing behind. The scripture described Lazarus as having strips of linen on him and a cloth around your face. That is how they dressed the dead body in biblical times. God showed me that the strips of linen and the cloth around the face represented the things we need to leave behind when we RISE. Like, those who are attached to the dead situation, the belongings or material things, the fear of walking out of it, the comfort you thought you had in it, the talk that people would do because your coming out of it, the money put into it, the emotions you carry in it.

Let me also add, when you’ve made the decision to come out of your dead place or places, don’t expect the worst…expect the best! Expecting the worst will already determine the outcome. You have to BELIEVE that God is bringing you to a better place and that He will work it all out for your good. So, expect the great!  There should be an excitement in following God, a satisfaction.  The thing was dead…you should be happy to let it go. Be happy that God is calling you out of it!  If your not joyous…re-examine that, and identify why your not happy to let it go. Bring the concern to God as well. 

Everyday I want to search my life to find the dead areas that I need to purge and dead things that need to come out of my life.  I encourage you to regularly go to God saying, “search me O’ Lord for the dead areas, the areas that I’m not producing fruit and also ask Him to show you the areas so that when He sweeps it clean; you won’t go back to it, you won’t go putting stuff back in that area. Ask the Lord, what have I become lazy in, what have I become complacent in, what could I do more  of, what have I forgotten about, what am I avoiding?

The Word of the Lord this week is…”When I call you out of the dead place…RISE!

Let me say I also saw in the Spirit my own self (which I know its for all of us) but I saw myself steeping out of my dead places but I wasn’t small 5’5″ Tara…I was a GIANT…I was BIGGER than my circumstances, I was walking TALL…I was BREAKING OUT of the places that keep me from truly understanding who I am in God. He LOVES me and He wants me to SUCCEED!

I pray this was an encouragement to you and that you will go before God this week, asking Him to show you the dead places in your life that you need to walk out of so you can thrive!

Then I heard this song in my spirit and I sang it out loud in my kitchen LOL
VICTORY, VICTORY SHALL BE MINE. IF I HOLD MY PEACE LET THE LORD FIGHT MY BATTLE…VICTORY, VICTORY SHALL BE MINE!!

What’s your motive?

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I took some notes after reading my devotional yesterday from Henry & Richard Blackaby’s Experiencing God Day by Day. And it is still staying with me. I keeps coming back to me. When God repeats things to me, I pay attention.

The notes I took yesterday are:
* when you struggle in giving what you have to others, you have forgotten where you received your possessions. EVERYTHING points back to the Lord
* Every good thing we have ever received comes from God.
* Sometimes we claim we are trying to be good stewards of our resources when actually we are being selfish.
* Freely you have received, freely give.
Matthew 10:8b

I thought back over my life how I have bee selfish with things and didn’t want to give to others and how God must have been displeased with me, but also how I have been convicted over it and asked the Lord for forgiveness and worked on not being that way. Pushing past the feelings and doing what is right. And then I’ve been on the other side of that where people have held back giving to me because of selfishness. We’ve all done it. It’s just….what are you doing now about it. Have you changed? Is it easier to give now. Cuz, some things take practice. You have to teach yourself how to do better.

I’m always checking myself and re-checking myself again to make sure I’m operating out of a clean heart, a pure place. Because, your intention may start out good…but we are humans, born into a sinful nature and sometimes our flesh, our desires get the better of us and we don’t do the right thing.

I say often, when I get to heaven…I want to be empty because I gave it all here on earth.

Everyday, God gives freely to me and I want to give freely to Him and others.


How would you know the TRUTH if someone didn’t tell you?

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Most times, “you don’t know it until somebody tells you.” If it’s not truth…its a lie.

We don’t like people telling us what to do. We feel we got this thing called LIFE under control and we are doing well navigating our way through it. But at some point in your life, someone had to tell you how to do things. Be honest. You didn’t just know how to do life. You didn’t just know how to do things. The reality of it is, we need direction and instruction. In order to get through this life, we will need right direction and instruction.

Think about right direction & instruction for life being your GPS. If you didn’t have it, you would get lost, lose your way, end up in a crash, take some wrong turns and go down one way streets. If you didn’t have right direction and instruction, you would put things together wrong, you would move prematurely, you would forget ingredients, you would be unprepared….do you see where I’m going with this? Compare what I jus mentioned with LIFE. Go back and read it and relate it to LIFE.

We all know life is made up of trials and errors, and making mistakes to learn. The one character trait we should master is being teachable. You don’t have to agree with everything your being taught, but learn to take what you need and leave the rest. And don’t grumble and complain in it. My mentor used to tell me in the beginning of our relationship, “chew the meat and spit out the bones.” You ever see a cow chew? They chew slow. They take time with it. Learn to do that. I always ask God, “what are you showing me, teaching me in this?”

The Holy Spirit is my teacher. Sometimes I get my lessons (direction) from the bible, sometimes it comes to me in prayer or when I’m in worship. I hear it in songs, in a sermon or a video of someone preaching and often times it comes from other people. God uses people to carry His message to us.

I say all of this, to say…don’t despise someone giving you direction, or instruction or TRUTH. Because you don’t know everything. And humans have a tendency to think they do know everything…when in actuality we don’t. And most times, you don’t know until someone tells you. All your life you could have felt like you were right about something until someone brings you the TRUTH and then you realize, all along; you’ve had it wrong. In that moment, Thank the Lord for showing you the TRUTH. Truth sets you free from believing the lie. You walk differently, act differently, you even talk differently when you know the TRUTH.

Don’t despise someone changing your directions. God knows what we have need of before we ask it or think it. and He will use multiple ways to get what we need to us. If I offer some direction to you, I want to teach you something new. I want to give you another way to look at things. Please don’t take it as me judging you…I’m loving you.

Part of my journey…Pt. 1

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I shared this on my Facebook page today and felt led to share it on the blog.

Quick read…

3 years ago I was developing and writing my blog but then I got this job and little by little pulled away from it.  When I was in Raleigh, NC on vacation last month at a ministry conference,  the Lord told me to revive the blog when I got back home.  Start in September, my birth month and write something everyday.
I was trying to figure out what, when, and how I was going to do this..  God said it, and I must be obedient but I just wasn’t sure how.  Anyway, I left it there and said to myself…God will show me.
2 days later (the day I was leaving to come home) in the hotel lobby I see a woman from the conference, and we begin talking.  She’s an author.   I tell her that there was a prophecy spoken over my life to ‘write the books.’  But I just don’t know where to start.  We talk some more and she gives me a suggestion to write everyday for 15 minutes to begin to discipline myself to write.   I mention to her what the Lord told me about my blog.  She says, your 15 minutes of writing  each day is your blog!
And just like that…God gave me instructions on how to do it.
So on September 1st I revived my blog.  It’s my life journey, my Christian walk, what God is showing, my mistakes, my failures, my successes, how I’m getting through, how we can help others and ourselves, some parenting info, some dating tips, marriage and more. In all my living, learning, searching the one thing that always came back to me was a desire to just live right.
So that’s my blog name…
Just Wanna Live Right
I always say…If you dont feel something you learn is for you, share it with someone else.  They may need it.  God may have allowed you to hear/read/learn it so you could share it with someone else.   Or you just may not need it at that time.  God is planting a seed for later, that He will bring increase to in due season.  LIKE my blog, follow me and share it.
Leave comments, converse with me.  Let me learn from you too.

Do you know where you’re going to?

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(remember that song)

Let me preface todays post with…some of my writings I’m reviving/bringing back to life.  I wrote them during my journey and I still find them appropriate for today.  Some things become re-occurring themes in our life and some things come back full circle.  When this happens, I believe it is a sign that we need to be paying attention.  It reminds me of when reading the bible; you read God saying something twice.  God is repeating himself.  To me, that means…we need to be paying attention!  There is purpose for everything that God says…he doesn’t just talk to be talking.  LISTEN and be mindful of the repetition of things in your life.

So now, I wrote this back in (2014) and I still stand by it.  Again you are being reminded that you have a purpose…let’s figure out what and why we are here so we can get to work!

I feel some type of way when I hear someone say ‘I don’t know what I want’ when it comes to life or relationships or making decisions.

If you don’t know…then where are you going?

What is your direction in life?  Think about that for a moment.  Have you made any goals for yourself lately?  Have you thought about what you want your next move to be?  Have you looked at your life and saw some things you want to change?  Do you want more?  Or maybe you need to slow down?

Especially for those who have children. You have been given the responsibility to lead, nurture and raise a life, but you have no direction?  No boo, that can’t work.   But what you can do is…make a decision, especially for the well-being of your child(ren) and begin making plans.  There is no better time than NOW!

We ALL have our own individual purpose for being here on this earth. We are living on purpose…not by accident. You have something to give, something to do, something to accomplish, something to create, someone to assist. You gotta figure out what it is. Find the path to your destiny.

If you are just here, living day to day you’re not fulfilling what God has placed in you from birth. And…no one can do it but YOU!

Listen….you already know what I’m trying to do with my life, from what I’ve shared on the blog and in the About Me section.  So if you need some help getting there…post a comment, I’ll respond back to you.  Say it out loud.  God wants us to succeed in this life, but we have to do our part.  We have to seek out what we need.  Ask for help, read a book, find a mentor or friend you can confide in.  God gives direction.  He doesn’t leave you out here by yourself to fend for yourself.  Even if you don’t have anyone else in the world to rely on…you have God.

And let me tell you something about God that you probably figured didn’t apply to you…even if we make mistakes, gave up, didn’t listen to Him the 1st time or 2nd time or even the 3rd time…He’s still waiting for you to come back to Him.  If you repent (which means to truly be sorry and turn from what displeases God), ask forgiveness…God is there with open arms.

And you start again.  Just like that.  Gods love does not keep a record of your wrongs, or bring it back up to you.  Remember, He wants you to be successful in this life.  God is longsuffering towards us, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance.

In 2014, I wrote this encouraging someone to work towards a more responsible, mature and purposeful YOU!!!

In 2019, I’m still encouraging you!  Find your purpose!  Meet your goals! Find YOU!

(Here are the lyrics to the song – chorus)

Do You Know
Where you’re going to?
Do you like the things?
That life is showing you
Where are you going to?
Do you know?

Do you get?
What you’re hoping for?
When you look behind you
There’s no open doors
What are you hoping for?
Do you know?

YOU have purpose….yes YOU!

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What is purpose?  It’s been a trending word for awhile now.  Purpose means…the reason for which something was created or exists.

Don’t let anyone tell you or make you feel as if you don’t have purpose!  You were created, right?  You are here, right?  Then you have purpose!

Some people walk this earth their whole life not fully knowing or understanding who they are or what they are supposed to do.  Some of us are freestyling life with some routine moments to keep order.  But we’re not satisfied.  You know there is something else for you.

Yes, some of us can make things work better than others or have the ability to make things look easy, but that does not mean you don’t have a place in this world too.  Find out what your purpose is…that is your assignment while your here on this earth.  Who did God create you to be?  What did He create you to do?  Your purpose is from God, so if you want to know it…you have to seek Him to find it.  

And if you know the answer, how are you using it to glorify Him?  Are you pointing people to Jesus in your purpose?  If your not, then it’s not God’s purpose…it’s become your purpose.

Jeremiah 29:11 tells us that God has plans for YOU. Which means he set aside somethings just for you. It’s coming!

But I must ask, what are you doing until then?  When we don’t know how to get somewhere, some of us WILL ask for directions. But some of us won’t. Some of us will get the directions but still try to find it on our own. But some of us still won’t ask. Some of us give up when it starts looking to difficult. Some of us never try.  Some of us become spectators and watch everyone else, never stepping out to walk in our own assignment.  What’s holding you back?  Think about it for a moment.  What are you afraid of?  It’s OK to admit that.  Say it out loud so you can confront it, deal with it, overcome it and move on.  You won’t be satisfied, completely satisfied until you are doing what God called you to do.

Jeremiah 29:13 says, And you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart.  You have a part in this…you have to do the work to find your purpose.  But I can guarantee you,  God will send you your help, people who can give you sound spiritual advice, someone you can talk to, give you clarity and opportunities to walk in your purpose. 

But you have to want to know God’s plan for your life, you have to be willing to put in the work, allow God to make the necessary changes in you, clean you up, fix you, renew your mind.  You can’t walk into your purpose…messy and unprepared.  See, that’s where many of us stop the process.  We don’t want to confront our mess.  But it’s a necessary part of the process.  

If your ready, leave a comment.  Say it out loud so you can be accountable to it.

No more hiding.  Your purpose is waiting for you!

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