I woke up this morning thinking about the live-in relationship.
It’s actually a very exciting moment for a woman to move in with her boyfriend because to us that is a sign that he really is that into me, we are definitely in a committed relationship and /or we may go to that next step….marriage.
I could be wrong with what I just stated and please correct me if I am wrong in the comments section (I love having the conversation) but these are all the things I’ve felt when he moved in.
My reason for this blog post today is to expand a bit on the dynamics of this situation/relationship. And again I do know every situation is not the same and they all don’t turn out the same way. But this could help someone whose situation just may turn out this way.
First let me say that as Believers…this is not a situation/relationship we should look forward to. We should have a standard set that we will not defile the marriage bed and be married when we live together with our husbands. I am big on saying things out loud even if they seem very apparent and even if we think others should know this. Maybe they don’t. So I say it out loud so we are all on the same page.
I have a difficult time understanding how we can remain comfortable in relationships of long amounts of time with no REAL-GROWN UP-MATURE-GODLY commitment.
We can agree to a 20 year mortgage commitment, buy a house with you or sign leases for an apartment with you but not a lifetime of commitment in marriage with you?
OK, maybe they don’t believe in all that, don’t need a piece of paper to prove that; but why not? Maybe you could bend in this one area. Being together in a relationship means compromise has to come into play at some point, right? So why not compromise in that area?
I’m just saying…a marriage license (yeah that piece of paper LOL) can be helpful…not hurtful.
God honors the covenant of marriage. Wouldn’t you want the blessings that are set aside for the married? Men…he that finds a wife, finds a good thing. You have some good things laid aside waiting for you, as long as you stay under the will of God in the marriage. Women…the bible tells husbands to love their wives like Jesus loves the church. Whew! Are you aware how much Jesus loves us = the church? He laid down his life for us! The blessings of marriage are endless as long as we are in the will of God in our marriage! This is a covenant = a promise ordained by God for man and woman.
But let’s fast forward to the future…in the event of a sickness or death. Without legal documentation of your covenant, you may miss out on some things. If you have children with the make pretend husband or wife they are next of kin. Not you. Don’t care how long you’ve been together, where’s the documentation to prove that. How many times have I read or heard stories of the girlfriend or baby mother getting left out because she had no rights to him.
I’m not saying this for selfish reasons and that you should get married so you can get half or all their money. I’m showing you that God understood and knew how all this would turn out. He knows how His people operate. Some of us are very deceitful. And he works all things out together for our good. He has set and established things for our good. But we have used our common knowledge to seek our own pleasures. Use godly wisdom to be prepared in all situations. Even love situations.
If you are in this situation and you are a Believer of Jesus Christ, make things right. As a Believer, you have acknowledged and agreed to follow the will of God for your life; to be obedient to the Creator. Living with your boyfriend or girlfriend is not the will of God.
In bible times there was a standard for husband and wife. A tradition that was followed. An agreement that was made before God and sometimes a ceremony or celebration. So please don’t excuse your way out of this by thinking they didn’t do this back then. Marriage is addressed in the bible.
But what has happened is, we decided to do life our own way. Make permanent choices and decisions with temporary people. We had children and bought big ticket items, set our life up all around a sin. At the time we didn’t know they were temporary. We didn’t know they wouldn’t be there for the duration. We didn’t know because we never asked God. If we had, he would have told us.
The awesome thing about God is that if we repent (say you’re sorry and turn from the wrong-doing) He is faithful and just to forgive you and help you get to a right place with Him.
I encourage you to go to God. Seek Him in all you do. Let Him make your crooked paths straight. And obey Him.